life

Early Morning Mission

The engine is just lugging along at a leisurely 600 rpm, not slow enough to really hear the individual cylinders turning over but slow enough to sound more like a low rumble rather than the typical smooth purr. Fact is, it’s the only sound on the pond this morning–shamefully I’m the only one making noise this early. I hate to disturb all the pond’s residents before the sun is up this peaceful morning but the plane is really very quiet right now while I taxi across the water, far more quiet than any boat would be. However, in a few minutes, once the engine has warmed the oil sufficiently, she will be considerably louder during the takeoff. Even then she’ll still only be making a fraction of the noise many planes make, and only for a minute or so at that–long enough for me to takeoff and head north. My Super Cub will make noise hardly long enough to be a nuisance to any of my neighbors. No, not a nuisance at all, more like the sound will serve as a reminder to all those listening that some fortunate soul is rising up into the grayness of this still morning sky and embarking on an adventure.

An adventure, what is that really? Well, should one look it up in a dictionary they may read words like “an exciting journey” or maybe something along the lines of “a dangerous activity,” things of that sort. But what is an adventure really? I suppose it depends on who you ask. An adventure to you may prove to be mundane to me, and an exciting, dangerous adventure to me might seem like child’s play to some. So this morning for instance, I could be just taking off and flying north to Spencer Cove for fuel and a visit with my friend Jim–a trip barely taking five minutes. Or my morning flight might be the first leg of a multi-leg trip across the country covering thousands of miles and dozens of hours.

See that is the beauty of it, an adventure is really whatever we want it to be and those around us do not determine if it is an adventure or not–we do. Try to imagine this…these neighbors of mine living around this pond, still in their long-johns and nightgowns, waking up this splendid morning in their cozy little cabins along the shoreline. Picture them shuffling their feet out to the kitchen and pouring their hot cup of coffee, finally sitting down at the kitchen table and staring out the window thinking of how peaceful it is here on “their” pond. Then you can almost see them smiling as they look out the window at the beautiful, calm water and reflecting on how lucky they are to live here and enjoy this serenity. All of a sudden, out of the quietness of the early morning they hear my plane’s engine as it struggles to carry me and my passenger over their cottage and north to destinations unknown. They will look up and wonder, “Where is that green airplane going this early in the morning? What could they possibly be doing this time of day and what kind of sites will they see from up there?” Then before they know it my plane will pass over them and disappear to the north, leaving them to hear the quiet slowly creep back in as things return to normal. Those folks don’t know if I’m setting out on a great adventure or just sight-seeing around the pond for 15 minutes, but because they are human and we are yearning for adventure–they will more likely believe I’m setting out on a dangerous journey to parts unknown.

I’m actually just enjoying the cool morning air coming in the open door and the sight of the mirrored surface of the water reflecting the soft light and clouds. The surface tension of the water is only marred by the small wake of my floats as they pass effortlessly through the water–it’s surface otherwise lies flat like glass and undisturbed. I’m the first of the day to mess with natures beauty, but certainly not the last. There will be countless boats, canoes and other craft plying these waters throughout the day but right now I have the place to myself.

I can see from the temperature gauge in front of me that the oil is now warm enough for my full power takeoff and I have completed all of my essential checks before taking flight–which admittedly there are not that many considering I’m flying a simple Super Cub! I swing around to ensure my passenger is as ready to go as I am and I can see her hair blowing well behind her in the early morning light as she stares at the spruce lined shore. I ask if she’s ready to takeoff and see the sun rise from a vantage point reserved for only a few adventurous souls, she smiles the most beautiful smile and nods her approval–no words are needed. I advance the throttle and the plane is on the step and in the air in mere seconds, then my green machine pulls us both easily into the ever lightening sky. I can’t help but notice as we pass over the shoreline, one of my neighbors is sitting out on his deck watching us fly over his cabin and I roll the plane slightly so he can see me wave from the cockpit. Is he thinking those same thoughts we discussed earlier? Or is he annoyed we are making noise this morning and disturbing his tranquil view? His wave back is my answer, he certainly didn’t seem to mind the short period of broken silence.

As the plane climbs through 1,000 feet the suns first rays are striking the plane leaving us with a typically beautiful sunrise as the rays play off the surrounding mountains, lakes and ponds. This is my passengers first time in a floatplane and I’ve been telling her it is the best type of flying there is, that she really must try it–so I can’t help but turn around to see her expression. In the warm reddish light cast by the rising sun I see a beautiful smile that started as soon as she climbed aboard the plane 20 minutes ago and has only widened as we have continued climbing higher. I needn’t ask how she’s liking it thus far, her moist eyes and beaming smile says it all. I think she likes this flying thing. I turn around and set a course that I’d been dreaming of forever, I set a course for our adventure…

Silence

Silence on Soliven Pond

Floats tailed-up on the “beach” where the ice-cold spring brook empties into the pond

Not a sound.

If I was sitting in front of someone, say I was sitting in front of you, and I showed you this picture and said it was completely silent you would probably be thinking to yourself, “Aw come on, there must be some birds making noises.” Not a peep…no black-capped chickadee’s chirping in the branches around my head, no loon melodies floating across the water, no eagle’s screeching along the ridge behind me…nothing. You might then go on to say, “But what about the wind in the tall pines and spruce?” Nope–can’t hear any movement in the trees. Just look at the accompanying photo and you will see that the water is nearly a mirror–scratch the wind making any noise. At this point you might have a puzzled look on your face and you would be skeptical still. “No noise? Not even a far away truck, or plane, or chainsaw…something???” Nothing at all. Well to be totally forthcoming, I can hear my heart beating and I can hear the pine needles and moss gently giving way to my feet when I move–but that is it.

Have you ever stood somewhere and heard nothing? It’s wonderful really, eerily strange and refreshing all at the same time. I mean we always have some sort of background noise. Right now for instance, you must hear something? One would think the woods are quite active and there is always something to hear, most of the time they’d be right, but every so often you get complete silence. It’s as if you’re being watched. It can be quite disconcerting–especially in the woods at night.

This particular day I flew into my secret pond, a pond we shall forever deceivingly call ‘Soliven’ Pond in order to keep any competition away from the pond’s sizable brook trout! I stepped off the float and into the cool ankle-deep water then pulled the plane up securely on the shore and walked a short distance into the woods to do a little exploring. I am typically very quiet in the woods out of habit and find myself really taking my time in order to be as quiet as possible and also to slow down and look at all the interesting things most people would walk right by. Within one hundred feet of the plane I spy an old wooden canoe being absorbed back into the ground along with its iron chain and paddle lock, a feather lost by a passing grouse, and a bobcat track in the stream-bed by the plane–possibly looking for that wayward grouse.

So it was not surprising that it had taken me nearly five minutes to walk the short distance into the surrounding trees. I hadn’t gone far at all when I felt a strong urge to turn around, as if something was behind me. Succumbing to the urge I slowly turned around to see what was so alluring, so tempting. The photo you see with this story cannot, and does not, do any justice to what I was witnessing–a beautiful sunrise that silhouetted my airplane with a gorgeous frame of trees and moss all glistening with the sun’s rays highlighting the morning dew. Absolutely stunning–and only made better by the complete and utter silence that surrounded me this cool autumn day.

As I stood there bathing in the sun’s morning warmth and soaking it all in, I was presented with one notable sense that could not be overlooked…I was consumed by a very “earthy” smell, the smell of freshly fallen leaves along with leaves of years past slowly melting in their unavoidable journey towards decay and return to the golden forest floor. I didn’t want to lose this picture in my mind so I took this photo in order to attempt to relive the experience later, or better yet, try to share it with others. After a minute–two max, I took a deep breath of this fresh mountain air, turned around and slipped quietly into the silent woods around me…

Memories

Late September iPhone 1015

At this altitude taking pictures is fairly easy but on still has to be careful

The window is open and the warm wind whips through the cockpit carrying with it the pleasant scent of the damp evening air accompanied by the spruce trees lining the lakes shoreline…it’s as close to heaven as I can get while earthbound.

I’m concentrating on holding the camera steady with my right hand and framing my subject perfectly in the viewfinder while holding the stick with my left hand–it’s more art than science really. I once told a dear friend I could use an extra set of hands and eyes during this part of the flight–she would have not only made the process much easier and safer, she would have felt what I felt, seen what I saw, and be moved like I was moved.

I can feel the vibration of my plane through the control stick and the throttle reverberate through every nerve ending in my hand as we fly northward towards the darkening mountains. The plane is very nearly flying itself one hundred feet above the deep water as we cruise along at ninety miles per hour. My hand is there on the controls only as a safety of sorts…my craft could fly itself like this for long periods of time without my intervention given the calm evening conditions, but I want to ensure we stay under control even should a stray gust of wind or other anomaly surprise us.

My eyes are drawn back to the left as I look out the open window at the only sunlight I’d seen all day. This sunlight actually was the first anyone around this area had seen in a few days, a few days of grey, murky skies and heavily diffused sunlight. But this sunlight I was seeing now was so welcome, so warm, so beautiful, and it would only last for a few more minutes. This sunlight was slowly fading as the sun slipped more and more behind the mountainous horizon making its way to more exotic places than mine–creating a beautiful sunrise to offset my gorgeous sunset no doubt, in far away lands more foreign than where I sat.

I glance ahead to ensure all is well and we are not going to fly into any hillside or other obstruction, then back to the view finder for some last second adjustments before taking my hand off the stick and gently pushing the shutter button–forever capturing another memory. After a quick check to make sure the picture is adequate, I roll the plane hard to the right and get back on course to my home base before night sets in. Fate does not shine upon those who tempt it and I know without doubt landing a floatplane after dark is tempting fate.

Another successful flight, another memory locked away in my mind that will be with me until my last breath. This life is exactly what I’ve been searching for and thankfully found…it keeps me sane, happy and whole. Without these things in my life I would not be complete. I suppose this life I found and built has a foundation based on being happy and content. All things being equal, I suppose my life is in a state of symbiosis. My friend would be proud.

The Mind

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If my mind needs some adjustment a good place to do it is in this Green Supercub

It was a long time ago…it was a short time ago. The mind can play tricks–it can really twist ones perception of time when allowed to do so. Either way, I will never forget. Couldn’t if I wanted to–which I of course don’t.

I look at the plane sitting calmly on the water and the memories come flooding back–it reminds me.

I look at the ocean in all of it’s power and mystery–and it too reminds me.

I smell the sweet scent of the beautiful spruce trees and I’m taken back–it reminds me.

I inhale the salt air feeling it’s pungent odor deep in my body and I’m there again–it reminds me.

Three hours ago, four months ago, a year or more ago…my mind is constantly in turmoil. Should one let go of those we miss easing the sorrow and hurt…or should we constantly keep their memories alive both in our minds and in our daily tasks? I’m not sure there is even a “correct” answer to this question. I mean if one thinks about it, it’s a very personal choice. I know it’s a decision I struggle with daily–hence the mind clearing exercises I find myself doing–the walks on the beach, the hikes in the woods, the flights over my beautiful state, these exercises are truly my therapy. I’m not sure of the “right” answer as it seems to change by the minute as of late. Maybe there is a symbiotic relationship between “letting go” and “holding on”. I mean maybe symbiosis has to be maintained in order to keep our sanity.

Too deep for my jumbled thoughts this day. One thing is for sure…the mind is more powerful than my self control in recent times…and being a slave to it I will do whatever it asks…

Late September iPhone 313

Beautiful sunset on Great Pond, Maine.

I used to think I could pass on to the afterlife any day and be content–satisfied. I felt I’d done most everything in life that I wanted to do and anything else was just frosting on the cake. Not that I was looking for my life to end early or anything that dramatic, but I was happy with the way my life had turned out and I had attained most of the goals I had set for myself. It was a comfortable feeling–like there was very little pressure and I was enjoying life…but sort of coasting through it so to speak.

So this bit of info demands a smidgen of background on my and my outlook lest you think I’m some sort of arrogant know-it-all that thinks he has life all figured out by his mid-thirty’s. This isn’t the case at all. You see, I had semi-intentionally stayed single until I was thirty-nine years old while making a career at sea in the Navy (sorry to the few ladies that had captured my heart up until this time, I had no idea this would pan out this way…it was just life…as I was finding out). So with this in mind, I had most of the toys I’d wanted and seen nearly everything that I cared to see…I had it all neatly done and the “box” checked. Or so I’d thought.

Apparently I didn’t have much of it figured out at all, life came along and threw me a curveball…I’ve noticed it has a way of doing that. Somewhere along the line I had an epiphany, I found that sharing the things I enjoyed in life with someone who appreciates them also is even MORE fulfilling than doing them alone! I know, I know, not a news flash to most of you–but it was a turning point in my life. This learning point was the basis of my finding the right person and settling down, I had the knowledge that with the right person my life would be enrichened immensely.

So as the years passed by, my life on earth as a married man were fruitful and I saw that I had been missing something after all…even if I didn’t realize it. We truly don’t know what we are missing when we’ve never experienced it…but as soon as you do experience it, you can’t figure out how you ever did without it. It’s like a hole is filled that you didn’t even know existed.

As time went on I started to feel content again and comfortable once more…but life happend as it tends to do. I learned I had a son coming into this world and Nathan completely changed me before he’d even arrived! Now I think twice before doing the more risky things in my life, be it at work or at home. I realize my wife would go on just fine without me (some would argue she’d do better! ha!) but this young boy, he needed a father; he needed someone to help guide him through life’s obstacles as those great souls helped guide me during my upbringing.

Now no longer do I feel like I’m ready to go anytime soon. Now I feel as though I have to do my best to live as long as possible–at least until I’ve done my part in shaping my son into a kind, caring, thoughtful and gentle man that will be a positive addition to society.

So on to the next chapter in life. The chapter I will forever call Nathan…a toast to our future success.

Jonathan

June iPhone Download 007

Jonathan’s hometown–North Haven, Maine

The Cessna Stationair motors along effortlessly as Jonathan, a frequent young passenger of mine, and I fly smoothly at just over a thousand feet above his neighborhood. I look over at the young boy sitting next to me, his face uncharacteristically shows no emotion. He’s unable to see out the window without the “booster” cushion he currently sits on, this cushion allows him to look down at the island where he lives much more easily. I remember the first few times he flew with me he didn’t have the cushion, but he’s been using it the last half dozen times or so and I can tell he enjoys seeing the buildings, cars and whatnot. What is odd this flight is his quietness, his lack of emotion. This puzzles me, I’ve noticed kids typically are unable to hide their excitement or apprehension when they are flying and Jonathan is always one of the children that enjoy it. Not today, this little fella is apparently the master of the poker face–even at the tender age of six.

Perplexed, I ask him what he thought of flying with me in the airplane. “So Jonathan, how do you like flying, isn’t this better than taking the ferry?” He doesn’t say much for a few moments then I hear him through my headsets, “It’s fun, the houses look so small.” He continues staring out the side window never looking over at me and acknowledging my presence in the seat next to him. This is a response that sounds familiar, a common answer among children his age but he’s quiet again and now staring at the instruments on the panel in front of him as we pass over the school he attends. Something must be bothering him I surmise, he would usually be looking out the window.

The needles dance in their cases and have the effect of hypnotizing their young prey–Jonathan seems captivated by the rhythmic movement and not interested in looking out the window anymore. I continue flying the Stationair knowing that oftentimes children will suddenly grow quiet in the plane when they are hiding the first symptoms of airsickness. Although today is not that bumpy I know kids are more susceptible to motion sickness, the medical reason escapes me but it’s not important, just knowing the signs is what’s most important.

I certainly have to address the possibility of him not feeling well so I ask, “Jonathan, are you feeling OK? You’re awfully quiet.” This time he peers up at me, “I’m not feeling bad, I’m just thinking.” Thinking? What could he possibly be thinking about besides flying when he is usually an excited young boy full of questions? Intrigued by the thoughts of this six year old I ask him, “What are you thinking about?” Once again he is looking out the window and he doesn’t respond right away, continuing to stare intently at his schoolyard moving swiftly by below–then he looks at me and asks, “What would happen if I dropped bubble gum out of the window? At school, Bobby said it will stick to a car or house, but I think it will just fly into the woods and be lost.” I couldn’t help but break out with a smile and feel the relief of knowing I wasn’t going to be cleaning up any mess from Jonathan’s stomach.

Of course he caught me completely by surprise with this question and for a brief second I actually thought about telling him of Federal Aviation Regulation 91.15 which plainly states we cannot drop anything from the plane that might endanger ‘persons or property’ on the ground…but of course I didn’t. Like any responsible adult I immediately removed the gum from my mouth and showed it to him. He smiled knowing instantly what I was going to do as I rolled the gooey, sticky mess into a ball. Thankfully he and I were the only ones on-board that sunny day so I gently banked the airplane back towards his school, specifically the playground. I quickly reached over with my non-flying hand and opened the window on my side of the plane allowing the wind to whip into the cabin as it passed by the plane at nearly 140 mph. The noise increased dramatically but our headsets allowed us to speak and hear easily as he watched me toss the gum out the window into the fast moving air.

Now for you naysayers reading this thinking I had lost my mind and should never have done something so silly…so dangerous…it was on a Sunday and there were no people anywhere near that schoolyard, but I still managed to throw it into the woods well short of the school–you know–to meet the all important regulation number 91.15. Most importantly however, Jonathan knows in his six year old mind that I not only aimed for the slide where he and Bobby play during recess…I hit it. In his mind let there be no doubt, it was a direct hit! I mean I am an adult, I am the pilot-in-command of the plane and I told him I could do it, so therefore he knows it was done as advertised.

I reached over and closed the window returning the noise level in our ears to the steady hum we were accustomed to. Jonathan was grinning ear to ear and not a word was spoken as we turned back towards the airstrip. I’m sure he was still grinning on Monday morning when he and Bobby found that gum sticking to the side of the slide exactly where I told him it hit as we flew by at 140 mph.

Those two boys have a memory that will undoubtedly entertain them for quite some time and surely any adult they tell will think they are just telling stories as children do. But this story is true right? I mean the gum really was stuck firmly to the side of slide. You don’t think anyone saw me did you? You know, the next day when I stopped at the playground while delivering the mail and placed a wad of bubble gum on the side of that slide. You don’t suppose someone saw that and is wondering to this day why some pilot in his mid-forties would take the time to pull into the school yard in the company van and place a piece of gum on the children’s play equipment? Who in their right mind would do such an uncouth, unsanitary thing?

The gum wasn’t there on Tuesday morning.